Work with Becky
Would it surprise you to know that over 70 million people experience estrangement? You aren't alone but embarrassment and emotional pain keep many silent.
Silence never helps. During my estranged years, I felt that if I said anything about the estrangement people would judge me. They would wonder what’s wrong with me. They would think I was somehow unlovable. Guilt and shame were constant companions. Have you felt similar in your estrangement journey?
I can promise a safe place to have a conversation and meet you precisely where your pain is today.
Together we can figure out next steps so that you know the:
- Worth and value you possess in Christ— regardless of what others say or think.
- Forgiveness for choices and decisions you’ve made.
- Process to forgive others who have hurt you.
- Internal peace that lasts even if a relationship doesn’t reconcile.
You might have landed here if:
- You’re estranged from a child or next generation family member— or you have contact but feel pushed out.
- You feel blamed, sidelined or rejected from a loved one’s life.
- You’re in a 2nd marriage and estranged with your spouse’s family.
- You’re grieving lost closeness, holidays or access to your grandkids.
- You replay conversations and wonder what you did wrong or what’s wrong with you.
- You want to forgive or maybe you have but you don’t feel it and wonder if it’s real.
This was my life for many years as I struggled with these complex family relationships. In some instances, a family member refused to tell me what caused the rejection and I was left to examine every conversation we had in an attempt to discovery why. The emotional impact can be profound and multifaceted when you experience a loved one that would choose rejection over having a conversation to try and fix the problem.
Does this resonate with your estranged relationships? I help women navigate this so that you can find clarity, forgiveness, peace and closeness once again with God — even if the relationship remains estranged.
1:1 Personalized Coaching
Everyone’s journey is unique and personal. A relationship with Jesus where you find true identity and wholeness is where true healing exists. My biblical approach to a 7-session 1:1 personalized coaching program is designed to help you work through the painful emotions estrangement brings.
Through this coaching you will develop a clear path to move you forward along with actionable items to guide your own healing.
This 7-session coaching series is called The WHOLENESS Path.
Here’s what you’ll experience:
- Recognizing the real loss
Name the loss of your specific role or relationship. It may be more than just mother. It could be grandmother, great-grandmother, mother-in-law, sister, etc. - Examine misplaced guilt
Separate responsibility from shame and the blame game as you take ownership of your part. - Surrender the outcome
Not every relationship will reconcile. Learn to let go of that as a requirement for your peace. Explore the process of forgiveness and why it’s essential to lasting peace. - Establish boundaries with love
Set Christ-centered boundaries without bitterness and resentment. Learn when to reach out and when to stop.
- Orient identity back to Christ
Reclaim your worth and value beyond family roles. - Rebuild a meaningful life
Create purpose and freedom to live in peace. When your energy is spent trying to understand and reconcile with a loved one who isn’t interested, you’ll burn out quickly and it will show up in other relationships. I’ll help you learn how to find passion and purpose as you move forward. - Extend grace without sacrificing your peace
God extends grace to you, and you’ll discover that you can extend to it your estranged loved one without sacrificing your own well-being.
The biblical approach I use will shift your mindset from “what’s wrong with me to what’s right with me.” And that will set you on a path to take control of your emotions and pain in a manner that’s good for your physical, mental and spiritual health.
If you haven’t already, this would be a good time to grab my free guide on finding peace amid estrangement. Take some time to work through the guide.
How to Pursue Peace Amid Estrangement
We are living in a time when loved ones choose to walk away from a relationship rather than talking through issues and seeking resolution. It may be motivated by politics, religion or something else. Estrangement is on the rise, and you need someone whose been there — who understands — to help you navigate.
Coaching with me isn’t about fixing your family or forcing reconciliation. It’s letting go of bitterness and resentment, accepting what is and finding your peace and purpose.
If you choose to move forward with me in 1:1 coaching, here's a sample of what you'll gain in the 7-session series.
Live from Reclaimed Identity in Christ.
Let’s face it, estrangement shreds your self-esteem. Reclaiming your true identity builds confidence and creates space to heal.
- Together, we’ll explore the thoughts you believe about yourself. And limiting beliefs that hold you back. You'll rediscover who God says you are.
- You’ll learn to recognize and challenge negative thought patterns.
- You’ll identify triggers and learn how to respond with calm confidence.
Confront Guilt & Shame with Authority
Guilt and shame are two sides of a coin and they work together to keep you locked in a mental prison. You feel guilty about choices, words spoken or decisions made. And shame as you feel as though you must be a terrible person. You wonder if even God thinks you are worthy and lovable. You are and He says so!
- We’ll examine the difference between guilt and shame and explore how you perceive them.
- You’ll acquire the confidence and authority to effectively silence these two accusers.
- You’ll be able to look at the estrangement with fresh new eyes, examine truths, own your part and end the guilt/shame cycle.
Learn To Forgive – The Fundamental Key to Your Peace.
Forgiveness is not one and done. It’s a process and you’ll learn how to forgive yourself and extend that to those who have hurt you whether you reconcile. And experience the profound peace that follows once you establish healthy boundaries.
- Together, we’ll explore the hard process of forgiveness and what giving or withholding it means to your ultimate peace of mind.
- You’ll discover that forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean reconciliation or restoration and you’ll develop a plan that you desire.
- You may not be ready emotionally or spiritually to forgive and that's okay. We can work with that too.
Entrust the Outcome of the Estranged Relationship to God.
- Together we'll explore a path to reconciling your estranged relationship if that's what you choose.
- You'll develop healthy boundaries to safeguard your relationship with God, yourself and others.
- Not every estranged relationship will reconcile. You'll learn how to live peacefully & without bitterness when reconciliation doesn't occur.
God’s peace is vastly different than what the world offers. It is not the absence of conflict as evidenced in many lives in the Bible. This peace is an anchor in your soul that will carry you through whether relationships reconcile.
God’s peace is vastly different than what the world offers. It isn’t the absence of conflict as evidenced in many lives in the Bible. This is a peace that anchors your soul and that will carry you through whether relationships reconcile.
TAKE THE NEXT STEP
If this resonates and you are ready to take the next step, click the link and answer a few questions to help me get to know you better. When you are done, click the Share Your Answers with Becky button and it will come to my private inbox. I’ll review and contact you withing two days to set up a free consultation call.
A little bit about this free consultation.
What it is:
- A free no pressure, no obligation discovery call in a calm, confidential space to talk about what your estrangement looks like.
- We’ll identify areas where we might work together along with expectations.
- We’ll clarify what you need most to move you forward.
- And finally, I’ll clarify what the 7-Session WHOLESOME path includes and answer any questions you have.
What This Call is NOT
- Therapy or crisis counseling
- Fixing or diagnosing you or anyone else
- Pressure to commit to coaching
- A sales pitch — it’s just a conversation
All calls are confidential and faith centered.
Are you ready to take that next step toward a healthy journey?
Let’s get acquainted as you tell me a little about you. Simply fill out the short questionnaire below. I don’t need to know the whole story, but the more I understand about what you are experiencing now, the more productive our initial call. Once you press the “share your answers” button, it will come to my private inbox, and you’ll get an email confirmation from me shortly after. I’ll then be in touch to schedule the call.
If we are a good fit with one another and you wish to proceed with coaching at the end of our call, it is important to know that I work with only 12 clients at any given time so that I can give you my full attention and energy. Each client enrolls in a 7-session series over a 7 to 10-week period. Sometimes, a client needs an additional week between a session to process or work though things. We’ll talk about that on our discovery call. The investment for this 7-session series is $699.00 up front or two payments of $375.00 each. Those who invest in their personal growth tend to get more value out of the sessions with results of stronger emotional and spiritual well-being.
The discovery call is not a commitment to proceed with the 7-session series.
Becky Kolb
Estrangement & Relationship Coach