Work with Becky
Would it surprise you to know that over 70 million people experience estrangement? Embarrassment and emotional pain keep many silent.
I know those feelings well. It’s not easy to talk about a loved one rejecting you. You experience stifling guilt and shame. The once close relationship with God feels more distant than ever. No wonder women remain silent. But silence never helps. I’ll provide a safe place to have a conversation and meet you precisely where you are today.
You might be here if:
- You’re estranged from a child or next generation family member – or you still have contact but feel pushed out.
- You feel blamed, sidelined or rejected from a loved one’s life.
- You’re in a 2nd marriage with estrangement from your spouse’s family.
- You’re grieving lost closeness, holidays or access to kids or grandkids.
- You replay conversations and wonder what you did wrong or what’s wrong with you.
- You want to forgive and honor God but your spiritual and emotional health just aren’t there.
I help women like you navigate these complex family issues so that you can find clarity, forgiveness, peace and closeness once again with God. You crave peace and freedom from this trauma.
Personalized Biblical Support for Your Journey through Private 1:1 Coaching
Everyone’s journey is unique to them. It’s personal and our one-on-one sessions are designed to help you gain clarity, shift your perspective, discover your unique identity and experience lasting peace.
I’ve designed a 7-session WHOLENESS path to guide you to take meaningful steps. You’ll have actionable items and a clear path to move you forward to your own healing.
As part of The WHOLENESS Path, together we’ll explore:
- Recognizing the real loss – Name the loss of your specific role, relationship or future that you see as lost.
- Examine misplaced guilt – Separate responsibility from shame and learn how to distinguish between guilt and shame.
- Surrender the outcome – Let go of reconciliation as a requirement for your peace. Learn the process of forgiveness and why it’s essential to your lasting peace.
- Establish boundaries with love – Set Christ-centered boundaries without bitterness and resentment.
- Orient identity back to Christ – Reclaim worth and value beyond family roles.
- Rebuild a meaningful life – Create purpose and freedom to live in peace.
- Extend grace with sacrificing your peace – Grace that does not require your silence or suffering.
The biblical strategies I use will help shift your mindset from “what’s wrong with me” to “what’s right with me.” And that will set you on a path to take control of the emotions and pain in a manner that is healthy for your physical, mental and spiritual health. You’ll discover inner peace that will enable you to live in peacefully even amid the estrangement.
I’ll help you forge stronger relationships, identify triggers and strategies to quickly reframe so you don’t spiral out of control so quickly.
This framework and approach are designed to be gentle, clear and meet you right where you are – in the beginning stages of estrangement or years into it. It allows you to feel seen and heard without blame or judgment and prepares you to move forward toward wholeness grounded in faith.
Coaching with me isn't about fixing your family or forcing reconciliation. It's letting go of bitterness and resentment, accepting what is and finding your peace and purpose.
Live from Reclaimed Identity in Christ.
Let’s face it, estrangement shreds your self-esteem. Reclaiming your true identity builds confidence and creates space to heal.
- Together, we’ll explore the thoughts you believe about yourself. And limiting beliefs that hold you back. You'll rediscover who God says you are.
- You’ll learn to recognize and challenge negative thought patterns.
- You’ll identify triggers and learn how to respond with calm confidence.
Confront Guilt & Shame with Authority
Guilt and shame are two sides of a coin and they work together to keep you locked in a mental prison. You feel guilty about choices, words spoken or decisions made. And shame as you feel as though you must be a terrible person. You wonder if even God thinks you are worthy and lovable. You are and He says so!
- We’ll examine the difference between guilt and shame and explore how you perceive them.
- You’ll acquire the confidence and authority to effectively silence these two accusers.
- You’ll be able to look at the estrangement with fresh new eyes, examine truths, own your part and end the guilt/shame cycle.
Learn To Forgive – The Fundamental Key to Your Peace.
Forgiveness is not one and done. It’s a process and you’ll learn how to forgive yourself and extend that to those who have hurt you whether you reconcile. And experience the profound peace that follows once you establish healthy boundaries.
- Together, we’ll explore the hard process of forgiveness and what giving or withholding it means to your ultimate peace of mind.
- You’ll discover that forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean reconciliation or restoration and you’ll develop a plan that you desire.
- You may not be ready emotionally or spiritually to forgive and that's okay. We can work with that too.
Entrust the Outcome of the Estranged Relationship to God.
- Together we'll explore a path to reconciling your estranged relationship if that's what you choose.
- You'll develop healthy boundaries to safeguard your relationship with God, yourself and others.
- Not every estranged relationship will reconcile. You'll learn how to live peacefully & without bitterness when reconciliation doesn't occur.
God’s peace is vastly different than what the world offers. It is not the absence of conflict as evidenced in many lives in the Bible. This peace is an anchor in your soul that will carry you through whether relationships reconcile.
The next step is to schedule a free discovery call to see if this support is right for you.
This call is for women who want support – not judgment, spiritual cliche’s or advice that minimizes your pain.
A Gentle First Step Toward Clarity and Peace
- This free (no pressure, no obligation) discovery call is a calm, confidential space to talk about what you are carrying and explore whether coaching support is a right next step for you.
- This call is not a sales pitch. It’s a conversation.
- During our call we’ll talk about what your estrangement looks like right now and identify what feels most heavy.
- We’ll clarify what you need most today to move you forward.
- I’ll clarify what the 7-step WHOLESAME path includes.
What This Call is NOT
- It is not therapy.
- It is not crisis counseling.
- It’s not about fixing or diagnosing anyone.
- It’s not pressure to commit to coaching.
This coaching may not be best for you if you’re looking for strategies to change or confront another person. Or looking to prove who is “right” and “wrong”. And lastly, it may not be best for you if you are looking for immediate outcomes for reconciliation.
My work focuses on your healing, peace and wholeness.
Remember, there is no obligation, just a safe place to begin.
All calls are confidential and faith-centered. You are welcome exactly as you are. Next steps are just below. Are you ready to have that call?
Take the next step here!
Let’s get acquainted as you tell me a little about you. Simply fill out the short questionnaire below. I don’t need to know the whole story, but the more I understand about what you are experiencing now, the more productive our initial call. Once you press the “share your answers” bar below, it will come to my private inbox, and you’ll get an email confirmation from me shortly after. I’ll then be in touch to schedule the call.
Becky Kolb
Estrangement & Relationship Coach